Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Broken Social Scene to Compete in 2010 World Cup

I don't normally care about sports, but I have to admit this is pretty awesome.

Broken Social Scene held a press conference this morning in Toronto to announce that they will be competing in the 2010 FIFA World Cup.

"I am proud to state that we will be the first mixed-gender team to compete," Emily Haines said.

"Yes, it's true that we're doing this in the name of progress, but I also want to headbutt Zidane," Kevin Drew said. "That fucker is going down."

The band has been training for some time in a fitness regimen designed to increase speed, agility and leg strength. "We've been working on this since 2003 or 2004. We're out there every day, even in the cold of winter. We want to win," Amy Milan said during the conference.

The Scene hasn't decided who will be in the game and who will be warming the bench, but head coach Ben Canning assured crowds that there is no shortage of talent on the team. "There are a lot of us, so we struck gold on a few players. That's just statistics."

"I'm not naming any names," Canning said. "But there are a few of us who definitely won't be in the game because they haven't got what it takes. We don't want to burn bridges, but we want to win."

Leslie Feist was later seen crying in the bathroom, according to Perez Hilton

At the conference, the team's jerseys were also revealed. Manufactured by American Apparel, they feature rainbow trim on the sleeves and a unicorn on the front.

Wow, wow, wow! Which team member's name do you want emblazoned on your jersey?

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